The Euphoric Self

I celebrate a “decade” of being an NRI. In fact a little more than a decade. We are the modern nomads. 11years and seen four countries. We travel, travel and travel all year round. Round trips only mean home land visits so often,I lost count.  The NRI tag that seems so glossy and luxurious on the outside, seems too cramped on the inside. The perks are good and exchanges rates are awesome,but there’s a lot more to than just that. The packing and unpacking, the cost of living ,non existent hands to lend a helping hand and the peek of loneliness and anguish every fortnight.  Singapore being a call away from India was the cherry on the cake . A 4 hour flight and we set foot on Indian soil. How good is that ? The initial years of NRI life was filled with round trips and all of them were to and from India. And return baggage always exceeded the allowed and we had to buy additional luggage space. We have evolved over the years and life has taught us much to still grumble and mumble ....

 It’s half past your usual wake up time and you wake up startled. Hello,Mommy guilt. You are for real. The world wants to keep you on your feet so they can remind you every now and then that your mom guilt needs to exist.  Kids using iPad -mommy to the blame. Like she doesn’t have enough guilt within -the society adds to her shoulders the guilt that she can barely hold. When daddy changes diapers he is tagged “The responsible father” but when mommy does the same it is “considered” a part of mommy duty she signed up for.  If mommy wakes up late, everybody is late. Every schedule is down the drain and everyone can’t hold themselves together. Despite moms running odd jobs appreciation is down to nil cause that is what she signed up for. Daddy becomes the “helpful and perfect parent” if he can handle the family chores for a day and give mommy some time off. As much as we appreciate men for what they do ,we seem to forget we are adding further the “mommy guilt” baggage when wo...

Christmas bells remind us of the year coming to a closure. It’s Dec 30 today, and the year ends with a bang. A huge bang to the inner and physical self. Someone once told me “everyone faces a big blow somewhere in life when they are reach the early 30’s”. It was a conversation that was forgotten and the year 2022 decided to remind me those words and did they ring a bell? A loud and dense ring right in the cerebral cortex.  How well do you describe a year that has shown you all facets of life? Happiness, Joy, sorrow, tears, pain, betrayal and above all taught life lessons with every event. Looking back at how this year has exposed people and torn off masks, Paved a brave self and well mustered within the strength I need. A year that has made me realise a mature stand that needs to be taken going forward and happy tears that drag along a brim smile.  If betrayal comes with pain,it also brings along a lesson for life. A vengeance to success and the need to prove self worth and lo...

It was new year eve and me as a little girl heard the term “New year resolution” for the first time. How much would the brain of a seventh grader process understanding not what the term actually meant. From what I picked up I decided I would take a new year resolution too and document my status each day in the complimentary diary the family received from some nearby store.  Jan 1 : My hands write what my heart does not accept. I will give up eating chocolates. Okay, maybe reduce them.  Eve of the same day : Good bye resolution ! I accidentally had a chocolate and this seems quite tough. Let’s catch up next year.  Each year rolled and the resolutions got better,wiser and more consistent. They were understood and well adapted to. If not down the drain, I did follow them quite well if not religiously. Somewhere in mid 2000’s :Older and much wiser I decided resolutions could wait and did not bother to set goals or commit to follow them. December 2022-This year seems a bit dif...

2019 . A day I vaguely remember. Hubby mentioned a country New Zealand a few hours away from Australia. No, I dint bother to lend a ear. I was cozy and comfortable in Singapore-Just the way it was. A year goes by and then struck Covid. With closed doors and having nothing to discuss the new country finds its way in our everyday conversations. YouTube feeds show more of New Zealand. Maybe it is a place that I dream of . Not quite sure I decide to google. A land where sheep’s exist more than the human count, where earthquakes say “hi” so casually, Sunscreens are an everyday mandate rooting to an ozone layer in question, a lump some 30% tax cut and a list that makes wonder why Zealand? Yet, there was more to dig the inner desire. The work life balance and the value of family time stuck the cord. And a landed property with my very own garden did it for me. The obscene beauty reminded me of screensavers that came inbuilt in any monitor I had previously owned. Greenery through my windows, Ca...

 Adieu Singapore. Till we see again …  Young and naive, a newly married me flew to Singapore. Little did I know this country would hold a deep etched place in my heart forever. 11 years and it seems as if just a day has passed and memories remain so fresh within.  The first time I saw a country so well kept and attractions that well meant it’s meaning. A city full of architectural wonders and multi cultural environments was a sight to me. The well lit streets of Little India and Chinatown during festive days are crowd pleasers with their striking sights and luscious food displays. Seeing the birds and animals not so in captive or enclosed within cages made me stare in awe. Years down and I still enjoy my every visit to the Jurong Bird Park and the zoo where I had many “first time experiences”. Vultures swooping down and perching on my hands to seeing penguins swim  into ice closures right before my eyes are memories engraved for life. The Merlion mesmerises one and a...